PLAYWITCH- Double Trouble

I can safely say Wotcher to welcome you for this smashing steamy issue of Playwitch featuring our hot favourite duo- Remus "Jaws" Lupin and Nymphadora "Kink" Tonks!

Apologies for closing down production for the expected May and June issues. This power-packed sexy July with the damp and dark rains and hot- hot humidity making us sweat bullets is a good time to take a "peep" at an evergreen and saucy couple- raging, unpredictable, brave and impulsive...

ooh someone show me a Bible right now! Tirra Lirra!

REMUS LUPIN:

An intense and complex "grey" character (in many ways than one!) introduced to the HP universe in Prisoner of Azkaban as the professional, soothing and absurdly young Professor (ooh!) R.J. Lupin, Remus Lupin has managed to bewitch both witches and wizards alike. I mean even the Victorians used to enjoy "Byronic" heroes and studs in their Romances who were dark, rough, sullen, mysterious and had a shady inexplicable past (Read Heathcliffe, Rochester or more recently, Ed Cullen *heart*) Of course, being the DADA teacher was an added USP in the "mystery package" because the previous teachers had been the main attraction at Hogwarts and of course job was cruelly jinxed resulting in the death or removal of every teacher after precisely one year... but Lupin was going to stay for us! Not only was he scholarly, kind and intelligent, he was also generous with the chocolate *ummmm..... cho-co-late! Aaaah*

Being a tragic and incessant victim of "bites" due to his condition of lycanthropy (or shall I call it- his "furry little problem"?), this hot candy knew everything there was about being "animal"! And who better at wolf-whistling or howling with raunchy pleasure? I can only envy Tonks at this moment... full moon nights must be an added bonus I guess! *Grrrrowwl*

VITAL STATS-

Birth name: Remus John Lupin.
First name meaning: The mythological founders of Rome were Romulus and Remus, who as a babies were suckled by a she-wolf.
Middle name: "John" from JKR interview
Last name meaning: Lupus='wolf' in Latin.
Other names: 'Moony,' referring to full moon’s effect on him. Peeves calls him 'Loony loopy Lupin'. On "Potterwatch" Remus's code name is "Romulus."
Born: March 10 1960 (year based on James's dates-DH16).
Died: May 2, 1998, killed by Dolohov at the Battle of Hogwarts
Ancestry: Half-blood (one Muggle parent or grandparent)
Childhood: "Was a very small boy" when bitten by Fenrir Greyback, transforms at each full moon.

Spouse: Married Nymphadora Tonks during the summer of 1997, before the end of July. Initially Remus was convinced that he was too old, dangerous and poor for her.
Child: Ted, named for his grandfather Ted Tonks, recently murdered by Death Eaters
Hair color: Graying light brown, gets a bit hairier than normal once a month.
Other characteristics: Werewolf; shabby clothing; often looks sickly and tired. Quiet but mischievous; people tend to underestimate him.
JKR: "Lupin's a wonderful teacher and a very nice man but he has a failing and his failing is that he does like to be liked and that's where he slips up because he has been disliked so often that he's always so pleased to have friends so he cuts them and awful lot of slack"
Voice: hoarse
Organizations & affiliations: One of the Four Marauders and Order of the Phoenix, infiltrated secretive community of werewolves in an attempt to learn what he could of Voldemort's plans
Career: Lupin joined the Order of the Phoenix after he graduated from Hogwarts. His lycanthropy made it near impossible for him to work at a normal job. The exception was when Dumbledore hired him to be the Hogwarts Defense Against The Dark Arts professor
Skills: Probably knows the castle and grounds of Hogwarts better than anyone except for the Weasley twins; Specialist in defense against dark creatures.
Patronus: Shape was indistinct
Boggart: The full moon.


AT HOGWARTS-

Years: 1971- 1978
House: Gryffindor
School awards, etc.: Prefect
Office: 1993-1994 Defense Against The Dark Arts school year: , on the 2nd floor of Hogwarts.
Artifacts: Created Marauder's Map with James Potter, Sirius Black, and Peter Pettigrew.
Notes: Shrieking Shack and Whomping Willow near Hogsmeade created by Dumbledore during Lupin’s first year to protect him on nights that he was a werewolf

REMUS LUPIN IN THE MOVIES-

Lupin is played by David thewlis

Born: 20 March 1963 in Blackpool, Lancashire, England, UK. Thewlis was originally considered for the role of Professor Quirrell in "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone" (2001).

NYMPHADORA TONKS:

From the moment of her arrival in the Order of the Phoenix at Privet Drive, JKR had singled Tonks out as the "bombshell" of the HP franchise, a female counterpart of Bill Weasley (even Mrs. Weasley thought so!), which is a true achievement for a Brit chic! I mean there is only one Muggle rocker who comes close to the "Tonks look" and I'm talking about Pink of course! But of course, Tonksy is much safer... From her varying lengths and shades of hair to the heart-shaped face (adorned occasionally with a pig snout on request!) the Weird Sisters t-shirt and boots- this Auror is one damn chic to reckon with!
Intelligent, skilled, funny, hip, young and rocking, and let's not forget the enormous sexual appetite for older, mature men *giggle... George Clooney... Johnny Depp... giggle*

It's impossible to get bored with a partner like Tonks who'll make sure your seated on the edge of that wild adventure called "life". I mean you went to sleep with a pink head and wake up with a blonde!! She's an all-in-one! Can we hear you hooting, wizards??

But then again what the hell is she doing with "mystery guy" Lupin??

Okay first- opposites attract!

And second- refer to the aforementioned "enormous sexual appetite for older, mature men"!

on the whole- a wunnerful howling fantastic couple, good at the tough and fun bits and awfully awfully brave and sexy...

*phew* need i say more?

VITAL STATS-

Born: c. 1973
Died: May 2,1998
Possible name meanings: Nymphs are spirits of nature in Greek mythology. They are minor female deities who appear as young, pretty girls, and are the protectors of springs, mountains, and rivers. A nymph is also a stage of metamorphosis in the insect world.
Other names: She disliked her first name and preferred to be called "Tonks" but her father called her "Dora."
Ancestry: 'Tonks' is considered a "half-blood" because her father was a muggle-born wizard.
Mother: Andromeda Black Tonks, who is the sister of Narcissa Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestrange
Father: Ted Tonks, a muggle-born wizard.
Spouse: Married Remus Lupin during the summer of 1997, before the end of July

Child: Ted Remus Lupin, named for her father and husband
Hair: various colors, changed at will.
Eyes: dark and twinkling.
Distinguishing features: as a metamorphmagus, Tonks can assume many different appearances. Her actual appearance is that of a pretty, young woman with a pale, heart-shaped face.
Disguises: An old woman with "tightly curled gray hair" and a purple hat, "a tall, tweedy woman with iron-gray hair", blond curly hair
Skills: Concealment and disguise, though she is "dead clumsy."
Career: Auror, member of the second Order of the Phoenix; a protégé of Mad Eye Moody. Part of the Advance Guard that helps Harry in his escape from the Dursley house

Interests: Popular music, judging by the 'Weird Sisters' t-shirt
Patronus: Previous one unknown; it changed to "immense four-legged creature" in 1996
House: Hufflepuff, (1984-1991)

NYMPHADORA TONKS IN THE MOVIES-

Played by Natalia Tena

So a toast and kudos to the celebrated July couple- the Tonks-Lupin family for their serenity-courage and wisdom!! Extra-credit for a cool metamorphmagus son- potential hottie and hunk (although taken as well, u lucky girl- Victoire!)

Teddy Remus Lupin!
May the brazen and subtle madness, love and lust never die! On Earth or in Wizard heaven!

PLAYWITCH- Poster Chic of the Month

That's right folks, you guessed! Our dear dreamy, suave Luna Lovegood is April's Poster Chic!! Combining brains, blonde hair and ethereal eyes, this beauty has a life of her own that's to be respected and not just drooled over. So men, do you want to wake up in the middle of a hot romantic night to find a pair of covetous orb-like eyes gleaming at you from the side of the bed... you've got a thing for sexy Ravenclaws like Miss Luna. Or would you picture a fantasy with Gulping Plimpies involved... we know the right babe for you! You can't typically call Luna the girl-next-door as she's far too unusual for a stereotype like that, I mean that unless you're next door neighbor goes to the beach in a swimsuit with gurdyroots painted on it... you get my point.
But be warned, not advisable for a one-night stand. Coz if you try anything sleazy with this wise babe, you'll wake up the next morning with nothing less than a Mediterranean Nargle hovering aggressively over you! Presenting- - - Lovely Luna's ASSETS!!

VITAL STATS-

Hair: dirty blonde, waist-length and straggly.
Eyes: protuberant silvery grey eyes with very faint eyebrows that give her a permanently surprised look, particularly since she doesn't seem to blink as much as a 'normal' person.
Distinguishing features: dreamy look, often seems to have turned up wherever she is completely by accident.
Father: Xenophilius Lovegood
Mother: Unnamed witch who died c. 1990, when Luna was nine years old.
Siblings: None.
Spouse: Late in life, Luna married Rolf Scamander, the grandson of naturalist Rolf Scamander
Children: Twin sons, Lorcan and Lysander
Home: A "great black cylinder" that "looks like a giant rock" on the top of a hill a several miles to the north of the village of Ottery St. Catchpole, where the Weasleys lives at The Burrow.
Birthdate: c. 1981
Career: Luna became a famous naturalist, and discovered and classified many new species of animals during her career. She never found a Crumpled- Horned Snorkack!
Possible name derivations
"loony" Eng. slang - 'crazy,' from "lunatic", which is from luna = Latin, 'moon', derived from the belief that sanity is affected by the phase of the moon.
"love" + "good" could refer to the fact that Luna shows the rather peculiar but admirable quality of loving those who don't show much affection toward her (judging by the way she acts towards those she knows are ridiculing her and stealing her things).

Fun Quotes:

• "Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure," said Luna in a sing-song voice.

• "I don't like dancing very much."
• "That was funny!"
• "Oh, yes," said Luna, "I've been able to see them ever since my first day here. They've always pulled the carriages. Don't worry. You're just as sane as I am."
• "I believe He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named is back, and I believe you fought him and escaped from him."
• "But people used to believe there were no such things as the Blibbering Humdinger or the Crumple-Horned Snorkack!"
• "Mistletoe," said Luna dreamily, pointing at a large clump of white berries placed almost over Harry's head. He jumped out from under it. "Good thinking," said Luna very seriously. "It's often infested with nargles."
• "The Crumple-Horned Snorkack can't fly," said Luna in a dignified voice, "but they [thestrals] can, and Hagrid says they're very good at finding places their riders are looking for."
• "Oh … well …" she shrugged. "I think they think I'm a bit odd, you know. Some people call me 'Loony' Lovegood, actually."
• "The Aurors are part of the Rotfang Conspiracy, I thought everyone knew that. They're working to bring down the Ministry of Magic from within using a combination of Dark Magic and gum disease."

AT HOGWARTS-

House: Ravenclaw (1992-99), same year as Ginny.
Patronus: Hare
Interests: Like Hagrid, Luna is fascinated by magical beasts.
Battles: Luna fought in the Battle of the Department of Mysteries, the Battle of the Tower, and the Battle of Hogwarts.
Notes: During her sixth year at Hogwarts, Luna, Ginny and Neville tried to steal the Sword of Gryffindor from Headmaster Snape's office; for punishment they were told to help Hagrid with something in the Forbidden Forest

LUNA LOVEGOOD IN THE MOVIES-

Luna is played by Evanna Lynch

PLAYWITCH- Poster Boy of the Month

Wotcher! This new feature on FelixFelicis makes it really lucky for all the Witches on Felix as it will amount to some good hard eye candy and drooling! Carrying on from a Muggle magazine that is popular among carnivorous men, Playboy, our special correspondent at Felix has decided to launch the Magic version, which will select a monthly dude or wizard and do a special feature on their vital assets, oomph factor and hottest pictures! Since the famous Ron Weasley's Bday just went by, we shall begin with the youngest most eligible Weasley...

Congratulations Ron, you have been chosen as the Poster Boy for March 2008 at Felix!

VITAL STATS-

Birthdate: 1 March 1980
Ancestry: Pure blood
Career: Ron got his wish to be an Auror when he was recruited by Kingsley Shacklebolt to work with Harry to reform the Ministry and seek out the remaining Death Eaters. He also helped George run Weasley's Wizard Wheezes. "The timing on this is uncertain; it is most probable that Ron assisted George later in life, rather than earlier, when his job as an Auror would have kept him extremely busy".
Mother: Molly Prewett Weasley
Father: Arthur Weasley
Siblings:Bill, Charlie, Percy, Fred, George and Ginny
Spouse: Hermione Jean Granger
Children: Rose and Hugo
Birth name: Ronald Bilius Weasley.
'Ronald' name meaning: Ronald=Old Norse Rögnvaldr: "Having the Gods' Power"
'Bilius' meaning: Bilius=bilious, one of the four Medieval "humors" (temperaments), indicating anger and peevishness. Ron takes his middle name from his Uncle Bilius.
Eye color: Blue
Hair color: Flaming red
From the books: "He was tall, thin and gangling, with freckles, big hands and feet, and a long nose".
"He was almost as tall as the twins already…"
At 17 he was "long and lanky"
Tattoo? Nah. Ginny's joke. She told the boy-obsessed girls in her year that Ron had a Pygmy Puff tattoo, but she "didn't say where."

AT HOGWARTS-

First year: 1991.
House: Gryffindor
Yule Ball date: Padma Patil
Quidditch: Gryffindor Keeper
Earned 7 OWLs: Astronomy, Care of Magical Creatures, Charms, Defense Against the Dark Arts , Herbology, Potions and Transfiguration. Unlike Harry, Ron received no Os (Outstanding). Failed Divination and History of Magic
Laurels: Special Award for Services to the School, Gryffindor Prefect
Broom: An old Shooting Star until late 1995, then a Cleansweep 11 in 1995 as a reward for making Prefect
Skills: Chess, analysis and strategy. Tends to be wrong when he is serious, right when he is joking.
Patronus: A Jack Russell terrier
Boggart: A spider
Handwriting: "untidy scrawl"

RON WEASLEY in the MOVIES

Ron is played by Rupert Grint